Today Bazake Media can exclusively reveal whether Sir Keir Starmer has been fined by Durham Police over the so-called 'Beergate' scandal, a matter over which he has staked his leadership of the Labour party and political career.
My husband has always prized my well-maintained phalanges. I've seen the salacious WhatsApp messages he would send his 'lad friends'. But he's learnt to love my new avian-like talons. And, perhaps, in a roundabouts way, so could Sir Keir Starmer as he presses ahead with his reform of Her Majesty's Loyal Opposition.
I adore my grandchildren. Are we still allowed to say things like that? Oh well. There, I've said it anyway. Let the Kraft durch Freude stormtroopers have their field day! But they dear little creatures, so delicate and lillywhite skinned, do have a rather troublesome habit of making one feel a little set adrift for the modern age. First of all they were watching a television channel called "The You Tube". The next they were...
My first week at Oxford University caught me completely off guard. It's not really the done thing or something you should admit around polite company, but I grew up thinking I was the crème de la crème thanks to my top class education. How foolish of me.
Due to reasons of efficiency and the safety of my children, I drive an imported American SUV that has been dubbed the 'Cyclist Slaughterer' after it was involved in the tragic death of up and coming Tour de France star Phillippe Claes.
When I arrived at the Tottenham Court Road flagship branch of Argos to try Excalibur, Artemis Living's newly released four person patio set, I feared the worst. I mistook a bearded, tattooed catalogue shop employee for the garden furniture brand's head of commercial.